What are some of the best ways to support someone doing something for themselves like quitting alcohol?

Don't put pressure on them to decide on a timeframe. I think a lot of my friends were kind of curious to see when I would stop, when I would go back to drinking. I don't think that’s helpful. Asking questions and showing that you're interested is great, and you can also ask them how they’d like you to support them. There's so many good podcasts, and apps, and blogs, and people on Instagram that you can follow, but I think it can be really helpful to immerse yourself in the sobriety community when you’re on your own journey, and if a friend is engaging in that content too, it definitely makes you feel supported. Also, making sure you’re catering for them and have fun zero%* options is so thoughtful.

Have you had many friends consider zero%* drinks based on your experience?

I think I have inspired a couple of my friends to have periods of time off alcohol. My partner just had four weeks off and he doesn't think he's done that since he started drinking. Lots of my friends have been having periods of time off from alcohol and they've tried my zero%* drinks and they're like, “Oh, this is great, maybe I don't need to drink as much as I was before.” A lot of my friends, and myself, were certainly stuck in this mindset of thinking we had to drink at certain occasions, like weddings or someone’s birthday, but actually, the more social occasions you go to and don’t drink at, the more you realise how fine it is. It's like with anything, practice makes perfect. You have to push against the norm when you quit drinking and just do it for yourself. It's really worth it.

What was your go-to drink when you were out with friends, and what is it now?

I’ve just swapped my favourite drinks for the zero%* versions. I still have bubbles and wine and the odd cocktail. I’ve also tried a few of the zero%* beers. The Heineken Zero is really good. I wasn’t really a beer drinker before, but it’s really refreshing.

What drink would you recommend for someone who loves wine?

When I did drink alcohol, I was a sucker for Prosecco or Champagne. I love bubbles. So now I enjoy zero%* bubbles. I also loved a gin and tonic, the odd cocktail and rosé. I really liked rosé. So now with my non-alcoholic drinks there's McGuigan who do a great range of wines. I love their Zero Rosé, that's one of my favourites. I also really enjoy their sparkling. Edenvale Sparkling Cuvée is a really low alcohol option too.

What about someone who loves cocktails?

There are so many good options for zero%* spirits now. You don’t have to have a specific mocktail recipe because you can just sub-in the zero%* spirits to your usual drink. For pre-made cocktails, the Naked Life range is really great.

What are some of your 2022 goals?

I’d like to finally get married! We’re going for our third wedding date in Feb. Everything is planned, and I’m excited. We’re going shark diving while on our honeymoon too. That’s on my bucket list. I’d like to produce and sell more art, and stay mentally and physically fit. Other than that, I just hope I get to see my family more often and easily in 2022. I want to be really present with them and make the most of that time together.

What advice do you have for someone struggling to set their 2022 goals?

Start small. Start with something you know you’ll enjoy doing because then you’re more likely to do it. Set your priorities for the year around what made you happy in 2021 and what you didn’t feel like you did enough of. That’s why for me, my biggest 2022 priority is seeing my family, because I haven’t been able to do that as much as I’d have liked. I also think it can be helpful to have more open-ended rather than black-and-white goals. Like “reading more”, rather than “read 20 books”.

What advice do you have for someone struggling to keep their 2022 goals?

I would say reset and refocus. If it's not working for you and you are finding it too hard to do then make it a smaller goal, shrink it, make it more achievable. Don't just write it off. I feel like sometimes if you set something that seems too far out of reach, then you're more likely to just not do it, but if you set lots of mini goals along the way, then you're more likely to do it. I mean, for example, this marathon, I wasn't just like one day I'm going to run a marathon and I didn't run much. I was running and I had small running goals before that, and I did a half marathon earlier in the year before doing this, and I feel like once you tick off a few little things then you get to keep going.

You gave up alcohol 8 months ago, what was the catalyst?

Anxiety. I always had it after drinking. I'd have this constant guilt and regret, and always this fear that I'd said or done something wrong, even when I knew that I hadn't. I noticed a real difference between my partner and I, he'd be happily chill the day after, whereas I would be racing around the house trying to do things. It was a number of things, but predominantly, it was the way that I was feeling when I drank, and after I drank, and just wanting to feel better.

How has that made you feel?

I didn't really drink much during the week, but we often drank a lot on the weekend. It was almost like, because we didn't drink during the week, I'd be like, oh, well I can have more on the weekend because it kind of makes up for it. Which is a really unhealthy cycle. And then you just get used to the fact that every Sunday you won’t feel your best. So, initially I was just going to do no alcohol for 30 days, but two weeks in, I felt amazing. I had all this time on my weekends, more energy, my self-esteem was better, my anxiety was not as severe, and I was like, why would I go back? I started to think, this might be a forever thing, but all my friends were like, “you don't need to put a time on it”, “just see how you go”, which is true, but they were worried I was putting pressure on myself, but I was like, “no, guys, this is the best thing ever.” It's one of those things where, I don't know, I didn't want to sound preachy, but I also wanted to tell everyone, because I felt so amazing.”

Socially, was it tough to do?

Not with my friends. I find that my friends have all been amazing. They were inquisitive at the beginning, but I think that was more curiosity than judgement. Now, they're just so happy for me because they can see that I'm happier and I still have a great time. If you're with good people, you don't need alcohol to have a good time. Whereas with acquaintances, at events and that kind of thing, I find it more challenging because I feel like there's a bit more judgement and misunderstanding there. There is also the fact that when you're with people you don't know as well, the social anxiety becomes more evident. I've noticed the times when, in the past, I would've reached for an extra drink because I feel awkward, and that's what everyone else is doing. But now I've got some strategies that get me through those moments.

Oh great! What kind of strategies?

The first is for when I feel awkward in a social situation. Sometimes when you are the only person not drinking, you can feel like all eyes are on you, so the trick is to just ask a lot of questions. People love to talk about themselves, so I find that really works and then I know the focus isn’t on me. Another is to decline offers of drinks with “I don’t drink”, rather than “I’m not drinking”. With the latter, I find people keep offering or try to convince you that you should. I’ve also been congratulated. Not sure if it was for my sobriety or because they assumed I was pregnant. The other thing that is super helpful is having non-alcoholic* drink options. If everyone else has something interesting to drink, and the only option for me is water or a soft drink, you feel a bit like a little kid, or like you haven’t been thought of, which can also make you feel awkward. Having an equally interesting, zero%* option means you don't feel left out. It’s more fun too. I love ordering a mocktail at a bar, and when we entertain at home, my fiancé Justin will make everyone a G&T, and make me one with the zero%* spirit. It makes a big difference to feel included.

What makes you feel good in the morning?

Exercise. I’m training for a marathon, so I’m running quite a lot at the moment, but usually I’d mix it up with Pilates or something high intensity. Up at 7am and straight into it is the best way to do it. I don’t always make it happen, but when I do, I feel better.

What gets you out of a slump?

A good podcast. Something upbeat or funny. I love Shameless. I'm friends with the Shameless girls and it's just one of the best. I also listen to Life Uncut and Shagged. Married. Annoyed. It’s hosted by a married couple in the UK and they just always put me in a good mood. There is also one about sobriety by two American girls, who have both stopped drinking, called Seltzer Squad. It’s great. Otherwise, I love putting on some music and cleaning the house when I’m in a slump. There is something about sorting your physical space that helps with your mental space.

What’s your cure for feeling overwhelmed with both work and social commitments?

Prioritisation. I always write to-do lists and I write what I need to get done that day and then what can wait, and what might have to get cancelled. Learning to say no has really helped me, and it’s good to strengthen that ‘no’ muscle.

How do you measure success?

It's probably a bit cliché, but I feel like success and happiness go hand-in-hand. For me, it’s definitely not about a certain amount of money or anything like that, but if I'm feeling happy, and I wake up and want to do the job that I'm doing, then that feels like success to me.

How do you measure happiness?

I journal every day, right before I go to sleep – without fail, even if I’ve been out, which I think is easier with the not-drinking. I write down things that I've enjoyed from the day and what I'm looking forward to the next day. If the things come to me easily, then I know I'm pretty happy. The same goes for when you are looking forward to things the following day. I know I'm feeling good if they come to me easily.

NOW EXPERIENCING:

Olivia Molly Rogers on finding your alt

Learn|

Zero% (non-alc)|

Interview

Olivia Molly Rogers on finding your alt

Read time 5 Mins

Posted 20 Oct 2022

By
Alexandra Whiting

The MVP of finding better options and putting yourself first lends her sage advice.

There will always be something about January 1 that promises a fresh start, new opportunities and bursts of raw energy and optimism for life. While hard and fast resolutions and set expectations of “new year, new you” don’t really do it for us anymore, we are all in for simply doing better and inviting more good things into your everyday. Olivia Molly Rogers is the MVP on finding better options. She’s a former Miss Universe Australia, mental health advocate, artist and author of Find Your Light (a book that teaches self-love), and at the time of our interview, she had just hit 8 months sober and was training for a marathon. What a go-getter. A beacon of doing better and putting yourself first, we asked Rogers for her sage advice on living life right and finding zero%* alternatives.

Q.What makes you feel good in the morning?: Exercise. I’m training for a marathon, so I’m running quite a lot at the moment, but usually I’d mix it up with Pilates or something high intensity. Up at 7am and straight into it is the best way to do it. I don’t always make it happen, but when I do, I feel better.

Q.What gets you out of a slump?: A good podcast. Something upbeat or funny. I love Shameless. I'm friends with the Shameless girls and it's just one of the best. I also listen to Life Uncut and Shagged. Married. Annoyed. It’s hosted by a married couple in the UK and they just always put me in a good mood. There is also one about sobriety by two American girls, who have both stopped drinking, called Seltzer Squad. It’s great. Otherwise, I love putting on some music and cleaning the house when I’m in a slump. There is something about sorting your physical space that helps with your mental space.

Q.What’s your cure for feeling overwhelmed with both work and social commitments?: Prioritisation. I always write to-do lists and I write what I need to get done that day and then what can wait, and what might have to get cancelled. Learning to say no has really helped me, and it’s good to strengthen that ‘no’ muscle.

Q.How do you measure success?: It's probably a bit cliché, but I feel like success and happiness go hand-in-hand. For me, it’s definitely not about a certain amount of money or anything like that, but if I'm feeling happy, and I wake up and want to do the job that I'm doing, then that feels like success to me.

Q.How do you measure happiness?: I journal every day, right before I go to sleep – without fail, even if I’ve been out, which I think is easier with the not-drinking. I write down things that I've enjoyed from the day and what I'm looking forward to the next day. If the things come to me easily, then I know I'm pretty happy. The same goes for when you are looking forward to things the following day. I know I'm feeling good if they come to me easily.

Click Image to Shop

Click Image to Shop

Q.What are some of your 2022 goals?: I’d like to finally get married! We’re going for our third wedding date in Feb. Everything is planned, and I’m excited. We’re going shark diving while on our honeymoon too. That’s on my bucket list. I’d like to produce and sell more art, and stay mentally and physically fit. Other than that, I just hope I get to see my family more often and easily in 2022. I want to be really present with them and make the most of that time together.

Q.What advice do you have for someone struggling to set their 2022 goals?: Start small. Start with something you know you’ll enjoy doing because then you’re more likely to do it. Set your priorities for the year around what made you happy in 2021 and what you didn’t feel like you did enough of. That’s why for me, my biggest 2022 priority is seeing my family, because I haven’t been able to do that as much as I’d have liked. I also think it can be helpful to have more open-ended rather than black-and-white goals. Like “reading more”, rather than “read 20 books”.

Q.What advice do you have for someone struggling to keep their 2022 goals?: I would say reset and refocus. If it's not working for you and you are finding it too hard to do then make it a smaller goal, shrink it, make it more achievable. Don't just write it off. I feel like sometimes if you set something that seems too far out of reach, then you're more likely to just not do it, but if you set lots of mini goals along the way, then you're more likely to do it. I mean, for example, this marathon, I wasn't just like one day I'm going to run a marathon and I didn't run much. I was running and I had small running goals before that, and I did a half marathon earlier in the year before doing this, and I feel like once you tick off a few little things then you get to keep going.

Q.You gave up alcohol 8 months ago, what was the catalyst?: Anxiety. I always had it after drinking. I'd have this constant guilt and regret, and always this fear that I'd said or done something wrong, even when I knew that I hadn't. I noticed a real difference between my partner and I, he'd be happily chill the day after, whereas I would be racing around the house trying to do things. It was a number of things, but predominantly, it was the way that I was feeling when I drank, and after I drank, and just wanting to feel better.

Q.How has that made you feel?: I didn't really drink much during the week, but we often drank a lot on the weekend. It was almost like, because we didn't drink during the week, I'd be like, oh, well I can have more on the weekend because it kind of makes up for it. Which is a really unhealthy cycle. And then you just get used to the fact that every Sunday you won’t feel your best. So, initially I was just going to do no alcohol for 30 days, but two weeks in, I felt amazing. I had all this time on my weekends, more energy, my self-esteem was better, my anxiety was not as severe, and I was like, why would I go back? I started to think, this might be a forever thing, but all my friends were like, “you don't need to put a time on it”, “just see how you go”, which is true, but they were worried I was putting pressure on myself, but I was like, “no, guys, this is the best thing ever.” It's one of those things where, I don't know, I didn't want to sound preachy, but I also wanted to tell everyone, because I felt so amazing.”

Q.Socially, was it tough to do?: Not with my friends. I find that my friends have all been amazing. They were inquisitive at the beginning, but I think that was more curiosity than judgement. Now, they're just so happy for me because they can see that I'm happier and I still have a great time. If you're with good people, you don't need alcohol to have a good time. Whereas with acquaintances, at events and that kind of thing, I find it more challenging because I feel like there's a bit more judgement and misunderstanding there. There is also the fact that when you're with people you don't know as well, the social anxiety becomes more evident. I've noticed the times when, in the past, I would've reached for an extra drink because I feel awkward, and that's what everyone else is doing. But now I've got some strategies that get me through those moments.

Q.Oh great! What kind of strategies?: The first is for when I feel awkward in a social situation. Sometimes when you are the only person not drinking, you can feel like all eyes are on you, so the trick is to just ask a lot of questions. People love to talk about themselves, so I find that really works and then I know the focus isn’t on me. Another is to decline offers of drinks with “I don’t drink”, rather than “I’m not drinking”. With the latter, I find people keep offering or try to convince you that you should. I’ve also been congratulated. Not sure if it was for my sobriety or because they assumed I was pregnant. The other thing that is super helpful is having non-alcoholic* drink options. If everyone else has something interesting to drink, and the only option for me is water or a soft drink, you feel a bit like a little kid, or like you haven’t been thought of, which can also make you feel awkward. Having an equally interesting, zero%* option means you don't feel left out. It’s more fun too. I love ordering a mocktail at a bar, and when we entertain at home, my fiancé Justin will make everyone a G&T, and make me one with the zero%* spirit. It makes a big difference to feel included.

Click Image to Shop

Click Image to Shop

Q.What was your go-to drink when you were out with friends, and what is it now?: I’ve just swapped my favourite drinks for the zero%* versions. I still have bubbles and wine and the odd cocktail. I’ve also tried a few of the zero%* beers. The Heineken Zero is really good. I wasn’t really a beer drinker before, but it’s really refreshing.

Q.What drink would you recommend for someone who loves wine?: When I did drink alcohol, I was a sucker for Prosecco or Champagne. I love bubbles. So now I enjoy zero%* bubbles. I also loved a gin and tonic, the odd cocktail and rosé. I really liked rosé. So now with my non-alcoholic drinks there's McGuigan who do a great range of wines. I love their Zero Rosé, that's one of my favourites. I also really enjoy their sparkling. Edenvale Sparkling Cuvée is a really low alcohol option too.

Q.What about someone who loves cocktails?: There are so many good options for zero%* spirits now. You don’t have to have a specific mocktail recipe because you can just sub-in the zero%* spirits to your usual drink. For pre-made cocktails, the Naked Life range is really great.

Q.What are some of the best ways to support someone doing something for themselves like quitting alcohol?: Don't put pressure on them to decide on a timeframe. I think a lot of my friends were kind of curious to see when I would stop, when I would go back to drinking. I don't think that’s helpful. Asking questions and showing that you're interested is great, and you can also ask them how they’d like you to support them. There's so many good podcasts, and apps, and blogs, and people on Instagram that you can follow, but I think it can be really helpful to immerse yourself in the sobriety community when you’re on your own journey, and if a friend is engaging in that content too, it definitely makes you feel supported. Also, making sure you’re catering for them and have fun zero%* options is so thoughtful.

Q.Have you had many friends consider zero%* drinks based on your experience?: I think I have inspired a couple of my friends to have periods of time off alcohol. My partner just had four weeks off and he doesn't think he's done that since he started drinking. Lots of my friends have been having periods of time off from alcohol and they've tried my zero%* drinks and they're like, “Oh, this is great, maybe I don't need to drink as much as I was before.” A lot of my friends, and myself, were certainly stuck in this mindset of thinking we had to drink at certain occasions, like weddings or someone’s birthday, but actually, the more social occasions you go to and don’t drink at, the more you realise how fine it is. It's like with anything, practice makes perfect. You have to push against the norm when you quit drinking and just do it for yourself. It's really worth it.