Taurus is having a chilled birthday soiree and you’re invited.

There’s a reason why Taurus is represented as a bull, but let's look past the horns (for a bit) and focus on their other traits. Like a fear of change, a love of shiny things, going with the flow, and their unapologetic and often brutal honesty. That may sound like we’re having a dig, but let us paint you a picture. Yes, they may be all those things, but they’re also hard-working (when they’re into it), really down to earth and make for super-attentive friends. Think of it this way: if they were a TV character they’d be Ron Swanson from Parks and Recreation. You know, stuck in his ways, a little bit of an ass, but also deeply loyal and chill. That’s Taurus. So, what do you get for a Ron Swanson Taurus on their birthday? Tricky question. Lucky for you, we’ve lined up a few ideas that are no bull (that a bull will love).

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1. Diamonds are a Taurus's best friend

Nobody in the world has ever said, “You know what I don’t need? More nice stuff.” Who are we kidding? However, unlike the Tauruses of the world, the majority of us aren’t out there acting like Scrooge McDuck either. A Taurus would quite literally dive into a pool of gold if they could. So, what do we give someone who loves the finer things in life? A bottle of Meukow XO Cognac. Why? Not only does it taste expensive, but the bottle is also luxe as hell.

2. No dramas

Picture this. You’re driving to a wedding. It’s a fair way away and you’re already late. You’ve got the groom’s best man in the back and your Taurus friend in the front. You’re making okay time, but oh no! You’ve got a flat. And you’re in the middle of nowhere with zero reception. You panic. The best man is furious and your Taurus friend? Shockingly cavalier. They’re in the front seat, feet on the dash (of course) singing along to Beyonce. This is the Taurus life. They are totally unbothered. This can be a blessing and a curse. While their chillness and general tranquillity help mellow the vibes, it can also be frustratingly unhelpful as well. So, if you’re shopping around for a birthday gift for a Taurus, you need it to match that go-with-the-flow energy. Opt for a chillable red like Chaffey Bros Not Your Grandma’s Chillable Red. It’s medium-bodied, beautifully floral, easy to drink and has a peppery, stalky finish to it. It’s best enjoyed chilled – just like your Taurus friend.

The Chaffey Bros Not Your Grandma's Chillable Red

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3. Nothing but the truth

Some call it foot-in-mouth; a Taurus calls it normal conversation. We’re sure they’re not trying to be rude, but, boy, does it sound like it. Debuting a new haircut? Stay clear of your Taurus mate – even if you like your new ’do, they’ll hit you with a “just being honest” and it’ll sting. On the flip side, they expect nothing but the truth from everyone in return. This means no calling in sick for plans right before you’re meant to leave. They will sniff out that lie tout-suite. You have to be honest with them, even if that means saying you simply don’t want to go out tonight; that kind of honesty computes better for a Taurus than any lie could. So, with that in mind, gift them a bottle of Fair’s Quinoa Vodka Organic. It’s fair trade and crafted in France’s Cognac region from quinoa. It’s silky, elegant and is totally transparent about what goes in the bottle and how it’s made. It's the no-bull approach that really appeals to your bull friend.

4. Stuck in time

Yeah, Tauruses are pretty chill most of the time. But if things change too much, too quickly, they’ll lose their minds. They like things as they are and 100% subscribe to the if-it-ain’t-broke-don’t-fix-it mentality (which explains why they are VB loyalists). Enter any pub or bar around the world and if VB’s on tap, they’re a happy sailor. VB changed their recipe in 2012, but due to mass Taurus outcry, reverted back to the OG soon after. That’s how much they dislike change. So, if you want to make a Taurus happy on their birthday, sling them a slab of VBs. They’ll be stoked.

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5. Work, work, work

A Taurus may seem like the embodiment of “no worries”, but behind the scenes they are all work and very little play. If something intrigues them, if they’re working towards a goal, by George! They’re going to achieve it. Like Queen Taurus – ol’ Queen Lizzy (RIP) – she looked chill and easygoing with her matching sets and corgis, but underneath the purple nanna bob, she was making things happen, turning the gears, making moves. They are the silent achievers of the zodiac fam, so when getting a present for their birthday, it needs to be just as hard-working. Maison Barboulot’s Pinot Noir is perfect. Not only is it a delicious drop but, as you may know, pinot noir is the hardest grape to grow and therefore every bottle has a little bit of extra hard work and effort squeezed into it, which your Taurus mate will froth.